bitterdiva

Masquerading as a Monday

I always welcome a three-day weekend. Any day that I don’t have to go to work and not charge it to my sick/vacation time is always a good one. But slacker beware, those Tuesdays will hit you double than the normal Monday. All throughout the day, your system keeps telling you it’s a Monday because you slept late the day before even though your daily Harry Potter calendar tells you that it’s a Tuesday.

So your system is thrown off kilter, but that’s all right, you can adjust and to do such just keeping looking at your calendar and keep reminding yourself that it is in fact Tuesday. The other beautiful thing about having Monday holidays is that if you’re the lucky person who has class on a Monday, especially if it’s a tedious and boring class (such as English Composition I) you don’t have to go! Just remember that on Tuesday so you don’t repeat a similar incident that occurred last Tuesday when you thought your class was that night when it turned out it was Wednesday all along.

Ah work, a place I go to earn the BIG bucks, all 93 of them on any given day. I come in, sit down, check my e-mail, stare off at space, listen to whatever live music I have placed on the computer or misuse the bandwidth and listen to the Chamber of Secrets soundtrack. I check my work e-mail and as usual I don’t really have anything to read, unless it’s a project waiting for me. I love projects, especially on Tuesdays masquerading as Mondays – they always seem to pop up on those days.

No e-mail? Excellent. I chug along the day printing out envelopes; all 610 of them sorted into their respective workshop locations. I even offer my services to help stuffing the now printed envelopes. I realize that our department should have our own printer with the capacity to print out a large amount of envelopes so I can do those 610 all in one pop instead of in batches or sitting there to put another 10 in my pathetic manual feed tray.

Then my little inbox starts to get stuffed with 5 or 6 envelopes from my boss. I need to print out 50 e-mails for a person but they’re forwarded forwards. It couldn’t have been something simple as to right click and print? Nope. I have to open two files for each e-mail and then select that wonderful option of editing message because outlook wouldn’t allow me to do that already. Oh and since it’s a B&W printer, I have to reformat the font color so the person I’m printing them out for can read. For some reason (Microsoft sucks) Outlook loves to crash every so often and so does the Spool. I thought that my newly bumped up RAM would eliminate such problems but nope, Microsoft still sucks with every possible application I have of theirs on my computer.

Fine whatever, tasks are completed and I’m closer to the time when I leave this place a little bit grumpier than when I first entered these tinted, mirrored doors. But that’s not all folks! For a limited time or after 160,000 miles (whichever fate deals you) you get the fun experience of driving in rush-hour traffic on the highway with your left rear strut catastrophically failing and giving you the most pleasurable experience of every bump, pothole, road joint vibrating and jostling your brain in your head. Don’t freak out though because you’re extremely exhausted, depleted of normal serotonin levels, and you find yourself safely at your boyfriend’s place of business (at least he’s not a pimp in the ghetto – though if he was, you’d probably driving a Caddy with hydraulics). At least you don’t have to drive the car the back roads – you get him to do it.

Called the place, got an estimate $350 clams. Putting it in perspective: it takes me 5 days to earn the amount to pay off that bill and that’s pretty sad. Cars are expensive, insurance is expensive, New York state is becoming expensive, and now it appears that SUNY tuition will become more expensive. Hey mofos, how ‘bout forking over a pay raise my way so I can remain at your organization?

So the moral of the story is, three day weekends are good, but those masquerading Tuesdays will kill you every time. Alright, maybe kill is too harsh, how about maim. Maiming is good, along with burning and pillaging – it’s my favourite pastime.

01:16 PM

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