bitterdiva

February 11th, 2002

With Valentine’s Day a mere 3 days away, people start to get all uppity when it comes to matters of love and sex. Men scour the earth, desperately seeking some VD booty, woman fawn all over love stories and pity themselves for not being attached to that special someone.

Lately whilst at work, I am bombarded by numerous males seeking that special someone. This is the problem with being a female on the internet – let alone an attractive one. The men that message me must have some extra chromosome running through their genetic makeup that enables them to conjure up that necessary chemical to ask a woman to show them their tits. I guess I shouldn’t bitch about such behaviour when I’m part of the population that encourages such things by divulging said pictures.

But honestly, is a woman supposed to be flattered by inane speak using words that aren’t spelled out such as u and ur in replace of you and your; of questions that could be simply answered by looking at one’s profile (profiles.yahoo.com/bitterdivas for example) which they already looked at before messaging you because they always like to judge a face before communication commences? No, of course not.

Then comes the matters of typical questions, what do you like to do for fun; what do you do for a living; where do you take classes; what are you studying; what do you look like? I realize that the majority of the population is average looking, but one rule men should learn about woman is the most hated question of all, how much do you weigh? Because after all, isn’t it looks that these men are partially going to base their pursuit of you after? And with the onslaught of media’s perfect image of a woman forced many of the females into a diet-botox-dyeing frenzy wouldn’t the question just make them feel more uncomfortable and more prone to not ever speaking to you again?

As an overweight-depressed-liberal-feminist, I realize most of the problems with the world; as a woman with a maternal instinct, I want to shield people from hurt; and as a angry and bitter bitch I want people to suffer the injustices they deserve. So those who really want naked photos of a girl that they find highly intelligent, zany, and with a good sense of humour (most characteristics of the said overweight-depressed-female), be careful of what you wish for, especially for the faint of heart. I have taken the motto “fuck ‘em” if they can’t handle what they see. Though to be honest, I really haven’t had many complaints.

Three days from now is Valentine’s Day. So while women are wishing that they are getting flowers and diamond rings from their respective partners, I’ll be wishing for men to finally leave me alone. The real holiday is today, Satisfied Being Single Day. I have spent most of my life being afraid of being alone, but now I’m fearing the thought of commitment. I just want to sit back, have some fun, and get a big slice of deep dick pizza.

11:10 AM

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